You want to give your woman pleasure and you know you can do it through oral sex, but she will not allow you to go ahead and show her how you can make her feel. This is frustrating because all you want to do is to make her feel good!
There are many different reasons why a woman will not let you go ahead and give her oral sex. One thing that it does not have anything to do with is withholding oral sex from you on purpose. She wants you to make her feel good and she is not purposely denying you the feeling that making her feel good would give you.
Trust me, she wants you to feel good about yourself and feel like you can pleasure her. But there is another barrier that is in the way of allowing you to do so.
I can't personally say which barrier she is putting up and why, but you can ask her which one of the following reasons may apply to her and because you have taken interest into the real reasons behind her denying you oral sex she may choose to open up and tell you exactly what her fears and concerns are about the whole situation.
Here are a few of the reasons she may be denying oral sex and a few suggestions on how to deal with it:
1. She's Worried What You Will Think When You Are Down There
This is probably the most common reason. Women are not always comfortable with their own bodies and especially their private regions. The worry about the taste, smell, and even appearance of their vagina and they don't want to turn you off of them completely, so instead they choose not to let you give them oral sex.
You can try assuring her that you love the way she smells, tastes, or looks down there. If you say it enough times, with conviction, then she may start to believe it and allow you to give her oral pleasure without worrying about what you are thinking.
If you don't have proof that you love the taste, smell, or look than assure her that you love her and you love her whole body without judgment. She may eventually allow you to go down. But remember that she will be watching your every move and listening to your every noise for a sign of disgust. If you accidently give off a sign then she will immediately halt oral sex and may deny you from doing it again. So be aware of your noises and movements.
You can also reassure her that every woman looks different down there and that she is unique and amazing to you. Most women do not realize that the way their vagina looks is okay and unique to them. Not all women's vagina's are created equal!
2. It Hasn't Felt Good In The Past
She may not want to give you access down there because the last time she had oral sex it did not feel good. In fact it may have downright hurt her! This is common when women do not know their own bodies and know how to direct men during oral sex, and it is also common when men do not know how to give their women oral pleasure.
You can fix this by assuring her that you have read up on how to please a woman orally and you have picked up some skills that will cause her pleasure and not pain. Tell her that she can tell you if it hurts or feels bad and you will adjust and do something else.
The rub here is that you will actually have to have read up and learn some pleasure-giving skills! If you haven't, and you end up hurting her again, then she may not trust you a second time.
You can also allow her to figure out what feels good by buying her a vibrator and encouraging her to use it on herself. Once she knows the right spots and pressure that makes her feel good she will be more able to direct you to those spots and adjust your pressure.
3. She's Been Abused
The statistics for women who have been sexually abused is shocking. It's no wonder that these women don't always want to allow their men to get up close and personal with areas of their bodies that are sensitive and have been used against their will.
In this case she may need help getting through her fear of abuse and the feelings attached to that fear. She will have to do that on her on.
All you can do is offer her the love and support of a good man and assure her that you will never hurt her in that way - ever. This means that you can't force yourself on her physically or mentally ever. If you do then you will lose her trust completely and will never get a chance to prove yourself to her.
Don't constantly badger her to give her oral sex but instead let her know that you want to pleasure her in every way you can. She will have to come around to allowing you to give her oral sex on her own.
Bellaisa is the owner of pleasure her tonight a website with relationship advice for men on dating, sex, and relationship issues. Learn how to please a woman orally and become a man that every woman wants.